“My legacy” (Series on kids)

Blessings to you and yours. This past week was one with many trials and I’ve experienced a lot of oppression but thank God we made it to the final writing of these series on kids. The topic I’m writing from today is “My legacy”. There are few definition you can find on the term legacy but when it comes to this context these two definitions do fit.

1. anything handed down from the past, as from an ancestor or predecessor:
2. an applicant to or student at a school that was attended by his or her parent.

Ad. 1 You may ask what is it that I past on to my children and the next generation there after. Well it’s plain an simple. The teachings of the bible may be engraved into their hearts as The Word of God traveled through generations out. As been pointed out before it is my duty to start them off right in the way they should go. It’s my responsibility to teach them the Word of God, How to pray, What worship really means and why it is so important to stay in the Lord that He may stay in us.

Ad. 2 You may ask which school I attended to well I’ve been to school with Jesus (Books of Matthew – Mark – Luke and John), After this I’ve attended college at the Word of God. (Thru the Bible), and now I’m attending at the University of the Holy Spirit as John and Peter. (As in the book of Acts.) This is what I’m going to teach them, so when they grow old they will know where they came from and that it is their duty to pass on these teachings to the next generations.

You see the bible says in Proverbs 17:6 “Old people are distinguished by grandchildren;
children take pride in their parents.” (MSG version)

You see grandchildren are a crown to the age, they bring joy to them, they are being spoiled by their grandparents (if it where you doing something that was not supposed to at that age it may have turn out completely different, now you hear leave them be)

Children take pride in their parents. In order to be their pride you must have done something good, like loving them, educating them (spiritually), feeding them, clothing them, covering them (prayer), helping them, being compassionate to them etc.

The bible says in Exodus 20:12 “Honor your father and mother so that you’ll live a long time in the land that God, your God, is giving you.” While reading this you can read also that you need to give them something so they can honor you in, bring them up, learning them the ways of the Lord and giving them the space to serve before the Lord. While providing this, they will experience their own relationship with God. A kid can only honor what they know. When the Psalmist is writing in Psalms 119:9 how young people can keep their paths clean “How can a young person stay on the path of purity?
 By living according to your word.” Further more the scripture also says that we need to keep the commandments in our hearts.

Proverbs 1:8 states the following :“Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.” This right here implies that both the father and the mother has a role in imparting Godly wisdom into their kids. Both has a task to fulfil. As it was my mothers task to bring me to church, teach me about God’s word and start me off right. Believe me, I wasn’t always as behaved as I am today. I can clearly remember one day  I was rebelling against her and she said in a very calm and serious way “I fear for you, do not forget that one day you will have your one kids and they will act out as worse or worser than you just did.” With other words what you sow you will reap. This right here got me thinking, had shaken me, woke me up. I didn’t want to be that kind of person, I wanted to change, that kind of change you experience when you meet God and has encounter Jesus following by living through the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

Many of the chapters in the book of Proverbs has this line written “My son, keep my words and store up my commands within you.” (Proverbs 1:8 ; 2:1 (willingness) ; 3:1, 4:1,4 ; 5:1,7 ; 6:20 ; 7:1 ; 8:10-11, 32-34 ; and so one in the following chapters. If you seek for this line you’ll find it integrated in every chapter. This here shows us that as parents, we need to repeat our selfs more than ones, more than twice. Their whole life we need to impart in them with love, kindness, compassion, grace… You see they need to be willing to develop their zeal for God’s teachings, Word. They need to know to fear the Lord. Not by pressing on to them  just by saying you must, you must, you must, cause this will led to rebellion. After this they don’t want to listen anymore but by modelling it to them it will penetrate into their hearts. As we have been instructed with love, patience sometimes in parables, sometimes just by questions asked that puts us to thinking for ourselves what would Jesus do. Learn them to pray about it and find out what is God’s desire. Learn them to live a holy life led by the Holy Spirit.

You can see through generations how the Word of God is passed down, this legacy is passed down in the lineage of Jesus (Matthew 1:1-17) This is a legacy that is continuing to be passed down to others. We will start in our own home and from their we are to spread it out. That is why we can read in John 1:1-5 “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. ² He was with God in the beginning. ³ Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. ⁴ In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. ⁵ The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome^[a] it.“

By repeating the Word on a daily basis it becomes part of a child it will be like a natural instinct. Like when somebody invites them to steal or do something against God’s will, they need to know what the bible says about stealing or any other topic of the matter. Kids need to be able and given the chance to develop that kind of attitude that comes in alignment with what the word of God says. Attitude is a certain behaviour to a certain subject/topic. You will act conforming that which you know and  have experienced. It is simply a settled way of thinking or feeling about something. 

As parent patience is they key word to instruct a kid. You see not every kid is the same and to be compared they have their own characters. They are unique and needs to be handled with care. They are innocent and fragile. They are in the molding process.

What does the bible says about spanking? (I don’t refer to abuse!!)  The books of Proverbs is a guideline for us to bring our children up Proverbs 13:24 ; 23:13-14 ; 29:15,17 ; 22:15. However it serves as good in our own relationship towards our Heavenly Father.

Practical teachings, this is a method I myself apply it’s a 7-steps plan provided by Focus on the family is: (optional but it is biblical though, everyone has their one ways and know their kids better) – my kids have the ages of four and six so this works perfectly in our home.

• Clear warning: this a warning that certain behaviour will not be tolerated.
• Establish responsibility: a child needs to own up his/her misbehaviour. This an example how this step can be achieved:”Bounty/Boopy, what did you do wrong?””Nothing. All the kids were running in the hallways of the church building.”

  “Try again. What did you do wrong?”

  “I ran into the hallways …”

  “I’m going to give you one more chance. What did we talk about?”

  “I’m not supposed to run in the hallways of the church building.”

  “So what did you do wrong?”

  “I disobeyed you.”

• Avoid embarrassment: All this accomplishes is shame. Take them to a private place or wait until getting home. I had the learn this cause I was brought up in another form so never knew what the damage actually was. So now I just wait or if it is a serious matter I call them in a private place to talk about the matter or I just whisper into their ears.
• Communicate grief: I don’t want to necessarily know that I am angry but I do want to communicate that I am disappointed in certain misbehaviour and that it should not happen again. Or I just let them know that my trust has been violated cause they knew better. You see as parent our self we live in a sinful world and when we fall short of the glory God looks a at us with a grieving heart just as a loving Father.
• Flick your wrist: Spanking – It’s to sting, to provide a painful deterrent to misbehaviour, not to injure. “When you spank, use a wooden spoon or some other appropriately sized paddle and flick your wrist. That’s all the force you need. It ought to hurt — an especially difficult goal for mothers to accept —  and it’s okay if it produces a few tears and sniffles. If it doesn’t hurt, it isn’t really discipline, and ultimately it isn’t very loving because it will not be effective in modifying the child’s behaviour.”
• Sincere repentance: After a spanking we call them my husband or I call them and this is the perfect time we can and will model love and let them sit over our lap, hugging and just talk about what happened. I don’t like spanking, so I often say sorry as they ask for forgiveness and excuses them self for the misbehaviour. These dialogues trains them up for a life relationship with God. A life of relating to God humbly and honestly as no other experience could experience.
• Unconditional love: Some of my most intimate times with my children is after a moment of discipline, my husband can testify about this. I will call the kids, and tell them that I am sorry but that sometimes it is necessarily, I will tell them how much I love them and that I don’t like those kind of moments so together we can work on the missing things to prevent the same misbehaviour to happen a next time. This learns them that God forgives us for our sins but that we must really repent at the core of our heart to not repeat the same mistakes over and over.

This was the final writing of the series on kids. I hope you’ve enjoyed it as much as I have. I pray that these words will bring transformation and be a blessing of any kind to you. Through trial and tribulations but I made it an you made it.

Be blessed.

With loving regards,

Shaina Li Domitilia-Margaritha

 

“My Household” (series on kids)

Blessings, here am I in the early mornings writing to you again with the follow up on my earlier blog “Little imitators”. Today I am going to speak out of the topic “My household”, as long as you understand that this is a spiritual matter that needs to be point out. When I am writing to you is not out of the carnal point of view. For as the Word of God is revealed to me in secret, in the same way I will make it public and  bring it to you without the need to make it  acceptable for you. You see the Word of God serves as revelation, to alert, a wake up call, as for it is written in the bible “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.” – Hebrew 4:12. It aches when we are not aligned with the Word of God. We tend to rebel against it, instead of leaving our own ways and turn to God, we go mad.

A vivid example of this is the story of king Saul. He was chosen by the people of Israel, but Saul misused his power, he stopped following God orders and did things as it pleased himself. Than there came David a simple boy that shepherd the flock. Everybody is singing and saying Saul killed thousands but David killed ten thousands.  King Saul is not pleased, he is jealous at the one God appointed and anointed to be the follow up. He is jealous at the one God qualified. So king Saul is now rejected by God and King David is installed. When we rebel against the will and word of God the bible describes it like sin of divination, and arrogance like the evil of idolatry. (1 Samuel 15:23) Let’s be intentional about the word of God and stop pretending and live by the standards of God. Stop the slandering of God’s children for we must account to Him what we did with His flock. Then came King David he wasn’t perfect neither but God still used Him. The word of God came to him through the servant Nathan (2 Samuel 12:7, 9, 13 and following verses) it ached David, he was ashamed and he confessed. The confession King David made is readable in Psalm 51. The consequences were still there even though he was pardoned for his actions.  (I’m jumping through the text) but when you study the bible around the topic Eli – Samuel – Saul – David while reading it, it will be made clear. 

So when God speaks to me how to manage my household I must listen (those that have ears to hear, listen – than the Bible says don’t be only listeners of the Word but doers of the word, this means live by God’s word, I must follow in what He is saying, I must fear God and I must start in my own household.. I need to make sure that my offspring grows up and be like Samuel who picked David as the one God had chosen. He grew in wisdom and stature (1 Samuel 2:26). At a very young age he could here God calling out for him, the only thing he had to say is “Speak Lord for Your servant listens”. I need to make sure my kids grow up in wisdom and stature just as Jesus (Luke 2:52) at a young age He was found in the temple courts among the teachers, listening to them and asking them questions. The hunger of God’s word consumes me, as David saith “for zeal for your house consumes me, and the insults of those who insult you fall on me” Psalm 69:9. 

Timothy the spiritual son of Paul wrote in his letters the following 1 Timothy 3: 4-5 (Elders) “⁴ He must manage his own family well and see that his children obey him, and he must do so in a manner worthy of full^[a] respect. ⁵ (If anyone does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of God’s church?)”  Now a days we feel sorry for the kids, in the community now a days you hear people say, a kid must be a kid, you find people against the fact the of kids learning to preach at small age or learning to serve God properly. We leave a lot of years go by while they are being touted elsewhere. There is no time left. Christ is coming, what have we done all these years. We are not supposed to grow children to sit, the must develop into disciples 

Then he writes again addressing now the deacons in vs. 12 “A deacon must be faithful to his wife and must manage his children and his household well.” 

As leaders, pastors or what the calling/ title may be, maybe we are just parens, but leaders and models in our own homes everything starts at home. The bible points out our duties as described in Ephesians 6:4 “⁴ Fathers,^[a] do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.”  This is the same as the writing as in Proverbs 22:6. I can’t minister to your home without ministering my own home. If I do so, this kind of attitude will be called a act of hypocrisy. I got to get it right first before I can help you. Whatever the arena may be I can’t help you with marital problems if I never been married and never experienced any kind of these problems and feelings. I cannot bring you to a place, where I myself never been there before. (spiritual)

The consequence of the actions of Eli’s sons brought death to Eli and sons. Eli knew what his sons were doing, but didn’t address it. We need to take care of our kids and stand up for the next generation. Some things are nature but there are some things that are nurtured, we must cultivate children with what is pleasing to the Lord. There need to be preparation. Otherwise they’ll grow with lack of knowledge. The bible says in Hosea 4:6 “my people are destroyed from lack of knowledge. “Because you have rejected knowledge, I also reject you as my priests; because you have ignored the law of your God, I also will ignore your children.” is this what we want? Don’t we have fear anymore for the things of the Lord? May God have mercy on us.. Jesus prayed to the Father and saith: Forgive them cause they don’t know what they are doing”

Experience: A while ago I was in the grocery store buying grocery and I was found standing in the back of the store looking at the salads, then suddenly I heard a warning call. As soon as I heard this I started praying in my inner self, cause I could not see what was happening due I was in the back of the store but I knew for sure something was happening I could feel my inner tranquility stirring inside me. That what was going on  at the time took place in the front at the main entrance/exit. I was thinking by myself Lord let me get home save to my husband and children. So while praying and gathering the goods I needed from the grocery I walked to the counter to pay for my grocery so I can get home safe. As I was approaching I saw two little boys around the age of 6 without any adult supervision, they were holding a pot of candy into there hands. They were shoplifting and the warning call was from all the people standing at the counter who saw them about to leave the store without actually paying for the candy pot. So they put those two boys in the corner and called another co-worker to handle the situation. They took the boys into the office and called for their parents. I was so shocked that I thought I need to get home fast and have another prep talk with my kids. Even though they know they are not suppose to steal or take something that is not paid for I wanted to ensure it. But the more I thought about the situation I was thinking where were the parents, the adults around that time. Are we tryin’ hard enough to see our kids start off right. What is it that we are teaching them that when we are not around they can put into practice and know that is not permitted to take something without paying for. Are we praying enough for them, are we spending enough time with them, are we hearing them out.

See I’m not perfect I’m full of rules ugghh (a part of how I was educated myself). As I start a conversation with my daughters and ask them about things they will say: “we are sometimes afraid to come tell you cause we know that you may get mad”. It is that moment that I need to balance and seek for a solution that will help them to get it right the next time and be open about it. I need to meet them in their needs and function behaviour, I need to re-evaluate myself,  I need to find the way to communicate to them until the point they know certain behaviour is not permitted, but even if that is not the case right now or it didn’t go as planned, ok so be it, the next time we can all do better. It takes both parties to involve so they can evolve to be as we are called to be.

Instructions for Christian Households

¹⁸ Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.

¹⁹ Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.

²⁰ Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

²¹ Fathers,^[a] do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.

  
Biblical description of a household according the word of God: man – wife and children. A household needs to be God centric. Your kids need to reflect your heart not your hinderances. Let’s not be so busy preaching that we can’t see what is going on. Let’s not loose sight on that what really matters. (spiritual vision) Let us not be consumed by our one things that we forget that the glory belongs to God.

As the ones responsible for the little ones we need spiritual vision, we need to hear from God. Never confuse the power of the Holy Spirit for the spirit of Beelzebul. It is because Jesus knew what was in their hearts He said to them (meaning the Pharisees) written in Matthew 12:22-30 “²⁵ Jesus knew their thoughts and said to them, “Every kingdom divided against itself will be ruined, and every city or household divided against itself will not stand. ²⁶ If Satan drives out Satan, he is divided against himself. How then can his kingdom stand? ²⁷ And if I drive out demons by Beelzebul, by whom do your people drive them out? So then, they will be your judges. ²⁸ But if it is by the Spirit of God that I drive out demons, then the kingdom of God has come upon you.

²⁹ “Or again, how can anyone enter a strong man’s house and carry off his possessions unless he first ties up the strong man? Then he can plunder his house.“

Prayer: Hollow be Thy Name. Lord I come before you today presenting you my household, do with us as It pleases You and do with us as see fit to do. We are merely people that wants to be used by You. Today I cancel every word that is spoken against me and my family. I rebuke every satanic power or any spirits that has been send my direction and I return them back to sender in the name of Jesus. I declare that my household is under Your management run by Your HOLY SPIRIT and covered is by the blood of Jesus Christ, whom died at the cross so we could receive the gift of salvation that was given by Your grace.! I ask You to surrounded us by Your guardian angels. Thank You Lord, all this I ask in the name of Jesus, Amen.

The word of God is, need to be, will be the foundation of my house. As for me and my house we will serve the Lord.. We humble ourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that He may lift us up in due time. Next topic will be released on Friday “My legacy” (series on kids)

With loving regards,

Shaina Li Domitilia-Margaritha